Connect With Us

                

SAGE Publications

 

Partner Sites

Friday
Oct262012

Let's Talk About Sex...During Sex

 “Oh yeah, that’s it, right there”

“That feels good”

“Don’t stop”

Moaning, groaning, and words of encouragement during sex enhance your partner’s sexual pleasure and a recent study suggests that talking during sex is also linked to your own satisfaction. People who communicate their likes and dislikes to their partners during sex are more sexually satisfied.

Talking about your sexual needs and desires is not always easy; many people feel that having sex is easier than talking about sex.

Click to read more ...

Thursday
Oct252012

Obama vs. Romney: How Politics Influence Sexual Desire

Obviously, many variables affect the decision to have or not have sexual intercourse (e.g., Are you in the “mood?” Did you have a romantic dinner? Did he remember the flowers?). Although most people probably don’t think the outcome of a political election is especially romantic, or has much effect on their libidos, recent research suggests that political elections could influence your sex life!  

Click to read more ...

Wednesday
Oct242012

Stranded In Barcelona: The Ups and Downs of Passion

A few years ago, I fell madly in love with a guy shortly before he left for a study abroad program in Barcelona. So I did what any rational person in my position would do: I made plans to stay with him for a month, bought a plane ticket, and spent every possible moment chatting with him via Skype until my long-awaited departure. We both grew increasingly excited about my arrival, and when I finally showed up at the front door of his hostel, things were, well, intense (in a can’t-keep-our-hands-to-ourselves kind of way). Things continued this way for a couple of days. But soon we realized that we didn’t have as much to say to each other as we thought we did, and the passion quickly dissipated. Within a week of my arrival, he dumped me, and I found myself stranded in Barcelona. (If that’s not the title of a country song, it should be). 

So, what happened? Where did all of that passion go?

Click to read more ...

Tuesday
Oct232012

How Can I Tell If My Partner Is Cheating?

In order to determine whether your partner is cheating, you first have to define what “cheating” means to you. On the surface, this doesn’t seem difficult—cheating is cheating, right? It’s one of those things that you just know it when you see it (or hear about it from a friend that saw your partner doing it). Well, let’s see just how absolute cheating is. Is having sexual intercourse with someone other than your partner cheating? YES! Maybe this game is easy. (Though it wouldn't be cheating if your partner said it was okay) What if your partner has conversations with someone at work, but doesn’t tell you? Hmm. What if you have a crush where you fantasize about someone else when you’re with your partner? Is flirting cheating? What about going to a strip club? What about Hooters? What about accepting a friend invitation from an ex-partner on Facebook? What about sexting?

Click to read more ...

Monday
Oct222012

If You’re In A Relationship, Is It OK To Browse Hookup Sites For “Innocent Flirting” And “Harmless” Fun?

BC submitted the following question:

Have you written much on gay hookup apps (Grindr, Scruff, etc)? I just had a lengthy discussion with my cousin on Facebook after posting my criticism of Dan Savage's latest Savage Love. In it, Savage wrote that a gay man can have a hookup app on his phone while in an exclusive relationship and just use it for chatting with friends and innocent flirting. Why would someone be active on a hookup app and, if confronted with a hot guy to hookup with, not actually hook up with them?

Dear BC;

This is a great question! Although I am not aware of any studies specifically examining how use of hookup applications impacts people’s relationships, there is plenty of research to suggest that bringing these applications into a monogamous relationship could potentially lead to trouble down the road. Thus, I don’t fully agree with Savage’s take that engaging in such behavior is completely innocent.

Click to read more ...

Sunday
Oct212012

Things You Should Have Learned In School: Correlation ≠ Causation

See some examples of correlation ≠ causation here.

Sunday
Oct212012

Sexuality Is Complicated...So Here's A Summary

Saturday
Oct202012

Week in Review: 14 - 20 October 2012

Friday
Oct192012

Match Me if You Can: Lack of Matching Between Partners Predicts Divorce

Let’s play a quick game. What do all of these celebrity couples have in common?: Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries; Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony; Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher; Heidi Klum and Seal; Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. If you said divorced, you’d be correct (we would have also accepted “lack of talent” as a correct answer). These couples are just a few among the many who had a marriage that didn’t survive, and some, like Kim and Kris, had barely left the wedding chapel by the time they were divorced! (Clearly, they didn’t think this one through before having a multi-million dollar wedding!). 

Click to read more ...

Thursday
Oct182012

Fighting with an Ex-Husband Harms Mother-Child Relationships

High conflict with an ex-husband spills over negatively onto women’s relationships with their children. In a recent survey of a random sample of 1,239 divorced mothers, conflict with an ex-husband was associated with increased feelings of parental stress -- the greater the conflict, the more mothers felt their children were challenging to deal with (acting out, tantrums, etc.). This stress reduced the quality of mother-child interactions. The researchers proposed that mediated communication between ex-spouses, such as with a lawyer or psychologist, could help alleviate some of this conflict and improve family relations.

Hakvoort, E. M., Bos, H. M. W., Van Balen, F., & Hermanns, J. M. A. (2012). Spillover between mothers’ postdivorce relationships: The mediating role of parenting stress. Personal Relationships, 19, 247-254.

image source: parentdish.co.uk

Wednesday
Oct172012

The Politics of Love

(click to embiggen)When looking for partners, we are attracted to others who are similar to us. Whether the similarity lies in personality, values, or political views, individuals tend to seek those with ideals comparable to their own. However, in a recent survey of college students, the majority indicated they’d be willing to date someone with a political affiliation different than their own.1 Yet this willingness may not result in stable relationships. In fact, relationships between partners who share political ideologies last more than twice as long when partners hold opposing ideologies (5.83 years vs. 2.30 years). When researchers asked heterosexual couples about their political values at the onset of their relationships and then again after 11 months, those who were still dating after 11 months had more similar political attitudes than those who had broken up.2 Perhaps as a result, research also finds that online daters are reluctant to reveal their political affiliation.3 Taken together, these studies suggest that people may be willing to date someone with different views, but they may also conceal their own political views to avoid scaring off a potential mate.

Click to read more ...

Monday
Oct152012

1.3 Billion People Can't Be Wrong About Relationship Science


We're excited to announce that Guokr Media will be translating and distributing our articles in Chinese. Welcome to all of our new friends in China!

Monday
Oct152012

Note to Parents of Adolescent Kids: Stay Out if You Want "In"

My daughter is 4 years old, and has proven to very evasive when asked about her daily life at the Montessori she attends daily. A typical dinner conversation will go something like this:

Me: How was your day?

Her: Boring.

Me: What did you do? Who’d you play with?

Her: Nothing.

That pretty much captures it. And I will admit that it absolutely drives me crazy. Why? Because if the details of her private life are this elusive to me now, there’s no way I’m going to make it through her adolescent years without some intense therapy. I always want her (and our son) to feel comfortable confiding in me and keeping me informed about what’s going on in their lives --- something that will become increasingly important as they age and spend more and more time in their own private social worlds.

Click to read more ...

Sunday
Oct142012

Every Woman's Dream Husband (Said Nobody Ever)

Saturday
Oct132012

Week in Review: 7 - 13 October 2012

Saturday
Oct132012

An Apology...Psychologist Style

Friday
Oct122012

After The Rebound… What Next?

Q: How likely is it that a rebound relationship (one where your lover dumps you and then gets with someone else immediately) will last? Also, how likely is it for two people who were once lovers to get back together, particularly after seeing/being with other people?

Thank you for these two interesting questions! I’m going to answer them one at a time.

1. How likely is it that a rebound relationship will last?

That really depends on two factors: the quality of the rebound relationship, and the strength of the rebounder’s attachment to their ex...

Click to read more ...

Wednesday
Oct102012

Body and Mind: How Seemingly Unrelated Physical Experiences Affect Our Relationships

What if I told you that simply holding a cup of hot coffee leads you to perceive others more positively?  Seems like crazy talk, right? Well, it may not be so crazy after all.

Embodied cognition (also called embodiment) is an emerging research area in psychology. Embodiment is the theory that there is a strong association between physical experiences and psychological states.

Click to read more ...

Monday
Oct082012

Drafting a New Relationship Blueprint

Last weekend, I went on a road trip with The Consultant. I was nervous, as we hadn’t been sexually intimate with each other since our first, failed attempt several weeks ago. A weekend away together pretty much guaranteed that we would try again. We have hung out a few times since that frustrating night, but I have made myself conveniently busy to give myself some time to process the new, more intimate direction of our relationship. He was patient and persistent, so when he invited me to spend the weekend away with him, I accepted.

Click to read more ...

Sunday
Oct072012

Dear Rihanna: Are You Really Still Committed To Him?

Wouldn't you know it? October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month and the interwebs are all-a-flutter with rumors that Rihanna and Chris Brown might be an item again. Even Oprah Winfrey has chimed in on the issue. We'll save discussion of whether Rihanna's apparent forgiveness of Brown is a good or bad thing for a later post (here's a hint: probably not so good). In the meantime, we thought news of their relationship rekindling was the perfect time to rerun one of our classic articles regarding why vicitims of relationship abuse often return to their abusers...

Click to read more ...